As much as I suggested not asking yourself that question I believe that in all cases it boils down to one simple thing: An imbalance in the relationship between you and your employer.

Think about it. When you were hired, you were given:

1> Objectives: Profits, sales, delivery of products, creation, shareholder value, customer facing milestones, etc.

2> Conditions in which to do the job: Office, infrastructure, authority, data base of clients, etc.

3> Tools to meet these objectives: Staff, software, peers, processes, policies, budgets, guidelines.

It does not matter what kind of job you have – you need these 3 elements to get any job done, assuming you had the right skills when you were hired.

Well …this all goes well for some time and then things start to change.

– Customers start choosing other products/services.

– Competition becomes fiercer.

– Unrealistic objectives that have consistently not been reached on a monthly /quarterly basis.

– The struggling economy had its effect on your employer’s cash flow. Cash flow is the lifeblood in the veins of a company. Cash flow problems if not managed, can kill a company overnight.

– The staff quit or became more demanding or indifferent, unmotivated or worse you could not lead them.

– You were not meeting your objectives or at least it appeared that you were not.

– Management change either at the head of the organization or your boss.

The combination of any one of these factors can put the company or your employer in “survival mode”. The first thing companies do in survival mode is cutting back: Budgets, staff, training, expansion, sales and marketing activities.

If the leader of your company did not plan or see this coming the ensuing effect is chaos followed by more cuts/changes.

This is where you come in – you were the result of these cuts. The imbalance.

There is no point og going over it in your mind since the decision to fire you was final and you need to move on. When everything was going well i.e. you performed and your employer performed; balance existed. When performance was affected this created an imbalance – nothing personal (really).

I am big believer that when you are in a Win-Win environment it can be a lot of fun. When things start to sour however this is what you must do:

1) Be a part of the solution, not the problem. Don’t wait to take that initiative – do it now. Find solutions to real problems.

2) Raise your profile by assuming more tasks and responsibilities.

3) Communicate to your staff that a “storm is coming and that we need to pull together”.

4) Keep an open mind and a positive attitude. Be flexible.

If you fail at any of these 4 initiatives you will simply be overseen by your employer. There is an expression that says: ” When the ship is sinking, the first thing to be thrown overboard is useless cargo”.

I also believe that at all times, you should treat the relationship with your employer  like a client /supplier contract.

Let me explain. You, the supplier offer services (skills, competence, actions and deliverables) and your client (employer) pays you for these services. You do your best to keep your customer happy and he pays you (salary, bonus, perks, car, laptop, etc) for a job well done.

The problems start when there is an imbalance which leads to one party “taking the other for granted”.

“Well if I show up for work and I keep my head down, the boss won’t notice it”.

The employer says ” OK we’re going to have to cut jobs. Instead of paying dismissal packages ( cash) we’ll just tell employees that they are on a list of redundant employees; we’ll give them 6-8 weeks’ notice and indicate to them that they would be wise to start looking for another job” (this is a real example by the way of what I heard lately as a new tactic by an employer).

If you treat your relationship like a client /supplier relationship at all times you will do your best to keep that relationship positive and… balanced. On the flip side when you feel that the relationship is deteriorating (worsening) and the client no longer appreciates your services … then it’s time to move on. This is not different than other client/supplier relationship you face daily: Choice of supermarkets when you buy food, your lawyer, accountant, your car, mobile phone service, and your bank and so on.

It may sound like I am taking the employer’s side – not true. I have done both; worked as an employee and supplier (consultant or CEO Coach). I manage the expectations of my client /supplier relationships a lot better now since I realize that every relationship has a beginning and an end!

With that in mind I strive to keep my customers (employer) happy. When he changes or changes the rules or the environment then I remember: “OK…I have to adapt or move on”.

Try looking at your relationship in this way starting tomorrow!

This will give you a better perspective on how you look at your employer and it will give you the extra level of power in your current relationship since now, YOU control where this goes.

Regardless of who you work for, how long it’s been and how much of a “good ride” it’s been for you, an imbalance will occur whether you like it or not.

Are you going to be ready when this happens?

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Worse is tomorrow someone will ask you who you are and what do you do? We live in a society where so much is “who we are” and “what we do for a living. It’s as if you’ve just lost your identity.

OK unless you were fired for something blatantly obvious such as having done something illegal, immoral or criminal, then I can’t help you.

If you are like most people that were fired for “uncertain” reasons, I can help.

First . I can recommend two readings:

The Peter Principle. This principle states that “in a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence”, meaning that employees tend to be promoted until they reach a position at which they cannot work competently. It was formulated by Dr. Laurence J. Peter and Raymond Hull in their 1969 humorous book, The Peter Principle,

Perhaps this is what happened, but you certainly will not accept this in the next few days/weeks or months.

The second book you must read is a classic. “What color is your parachute”, by Richard Nelson Bolles.

Paul…I just lost my job and you expect me to read? Answer: Yes.

I also expect you to:

1. Disconnect from work altogether for some time – at least 2-4 weeks.
2. Go out and have a few drinks ( perhaps many) with your spouse, partner or good friends.
3. Talk to your friends that you trust, explain what happened and GET IT OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM.
4. Take time to reflect on YOU, your skills, your interests and your plan.
5. Take time to go do something for you: Cycle, walk, shop, travel, start a hobby, play Golf, get a manicure, pedicure and massage…do something you like.

As I said in my previous blog being fired is a life stage occurrence (Marketing term) where something impactful happens to you (i.e. new baby, divorce, marriage, caring for an aging parent). Getting fired is right up there with those other occurrences.

Therefore you cannot expect to get back on the phone and send your CV in a flurry of activity hoping that it will be ok. You may be lucky however I can tell you that I will be short-lived.

The most fundamental thing to do is to accept the situation – OK I know it’s hard; you’re upset and you want to hire 3 lawyers. I know. I can also tell you that that most employers have bigger lawyers. I have used lawyers – good ones and bad ones and the outcome is usually dismal or not really in your favor. Every situation is different and there is a great deal of satisfaction to get closure with a lawyer. However make sure you have money – this is not an option.

Getting over the DENIAL stage is fundamental. You need to accept that there was some form of inequality between what your employer expected and what you delivered – regardless if it’s your fault or not …it’s immaterial at this point. Dwelling on who to blame, how much your boss was difficult and why no one else stood up for you will not help. This is wasting perfectly good brain energy and besides there is nothing you can do about it.

Getting over the denial stage frees up your mind and enables you to focus as to who you are, what you are good at. Remember when emotions are involved it’s hard to think straight.

Reading The Peter principle is a good book to get your mind off things.

Reading What color is your parachute is a must read since it will help you in a variety of ways:

1. Identify your REAL skills. There is an exercise that takes about 4 hours to identify your skills. This is pure gold and don’t assume that you know your skills. In fact you may not even know what a skill really is.
2. It will prepare you for the worst case scenario: No work for 2,3,4,5 or 6 months. Again you will go in denial and say “well that’s crazy … I’ll find a job tomorrow”. Chances are that you will not so you need to plan that now.
3. The book will enable you to re-discover yourself. Perhaps you were in the wrong job or industry, working with toxic people, not really able to explore your potential or maybe you were there just for the money.
4. I tell my audiences to read this book not only when you are looking for a job but it’s a good read to develop yourself and to progress in your career.

Next steps:

1. Set up a plan. Now‘s the best time for you to re-calibrate your plan and decide what you want to do in the next 1,3 and 5 years.
2. Listen to your words: Attitude check. Your attitude now is critically important. No one will hire someone who is pissed off, frustrated, negative or grumpy. Now do you see why you needed to reflect for a few weeks to get over the denial period and to spend time for yourself?
3. Make a choice. If you were not happy with your last job, identify the reasons and avoid something similar.
4. Network. I looked at how I found my last 10 jobs as an executive: 7 were through people I knew; 2 from headhunters one through  cold calling – it was a revelation for me. As one my mentors Richard Eaton says. You can either Net -Work or Not –Work, it’s your choice.
5. Find a Mentor or Coach. Remember a Mentor is free and with a Coach, you need to pay. I have both. In either case your Mentor or Coach will tell you that you are not thinking straight and won’t care if they hurt your feelings…do you think that a football coach puts on white gloves during a game? Find either a Mentor or Coach. Tell them what happened and get ready to move on.

When you look back at this tough period in a few years, you will realize that this was a good time to reflect and spend time to invest in YOU.

Although your job was important (perhaps too important) as ever in life what really matters is your support group; the people that were cheering for you: Your spouse, your kids, your family and your friends in other words, your fans.

You can get a job anytime but keeping real fans like these is far more precious.

Put this in perspective as you embark to discover your next challenge.

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In some cases you are aware of this terrible tsunami coming since the organization has publicly stated that there will be some cuts. In this case that gives you a bit of time to plan and dust off your CV.

However sometimes it comes as a complete surprise (read shock).

If you are a mid to high level manager in a private or public organization, your boss may at one point:

a) Think that you were not performing  up to your objectives  or,

b) Not like you anymore, or

c) Want to replace you with one of his former team members .

In this case then the “You’re fired “statement is quite clear. You probably did not see it coming. You probably felt that something was weird or uneasy and that “the writing was on the wall “because of rumors or fellow peers looking at you funny. It’s not easy to objectively assess one’s performance on the job since after all, your employer expected you to be confident, competent and assertive. And besides you thought… “The boss would never fire me”.

Result: You are out of work and it’s devastating.

Then you go through different mental states:

Confusion.

Denial.

Blame.

Anger and not necessarily in this order. The Denial state can stay with you for a long, long time.

Then you wonder why and why me?

I have a lot of stuff I wish they taught me at Business school and this is one of them. The fact is that in your career you will face setbacks and yes that includes being fired. But realistically which business school would gladly elect to teach something this obvious and depressing?  After all business schools build leaders, not losers!

This is where I come in as a Coach or the Messenger of reality, the Cold Shower. Now I cannot speak on each and everyone’s behalf but there’s a pretty good chance that you will lose your job at one point in your career. Pick any one of the cute word combinations I started with this post and the result is the same.

Why is this probability so high?

Competition is more and more fierce, companies have difficulty sustaining the business, Chinese and Indian companies are re-writing the rules on manufacturing and outsourcing. Add in economic calamities like the last recession and it’s no wonder that business is “Cut throat”.

I am not a HR person so I will not discuss what you are entitled to in case you get fired. Instead I will give you some uplifting (I know … I have completely depressed you by now) tips on how to avoid being fired in the first place in this post. As part two, I will bring some tips on how to move on in case that you have been visited by the “Grim Reaper”.

How to avoid being fired:

1. Results: One of my best mentors, Jim Cole used to say “activities are nice but results count “. You can be the hardest working soul in the office but if you are not delivering tangible results why should the company keep you?
2. Objectives…What objectives? Good question. Are you crystal clear on your objectives? If not that is something that you should have resolved in your first month of being hired with the boss. If the objectives have changed or you do not have a formal review process with your boss, then it’s time to set up a meeting and get re-focused on your objectives.  Hint:  Your boss needs you to meet your objectives in order for him to meet his/her objectives. Therefore you can assume that your objectives and delivery of these will make or break your boss!
3. Attitude. I spoke about this in my previous post. Are you part of the problem or are you part of the solution?  Organizations need winners. Are you spending too much time complaining on how things cannot be done or rather how things can be possible? Try to keep an open and optimistic approach when it comes to your objectives despite how tough and stretched they appear. Look rather at how you can overcome and set creative ways to meet your objectives.
4. Make a choice.  If you are not happy with your current job and you have tried to seek other opportunities internally then it’s time to move on. Don’t delay the inevitable and it’s a lot easier to find a new job when you are working rather when you are unemployed. If you decide on the other hand to stay with your employer, suck it up and accept that at times you may be required to give in 110%. If your dream is to become your own boss and have your own business – great however don’t expect this to be easy; “there is no such thing as a free ride”. We’ll cover this in another post.
5. Network internally. Even if you are having difficulties working with some peers, accept that you have to work with difficult people when you work for an employer so you might as well try to make this easy. The boss does not have time to babysit and solve conflicts since your ability to lead and deal with difficult situations is probably being tested.
6. Step up to the plate. Take on new assignments. When the boss is asking who wants to handle a new responsibility offer to tackle it and seize the moment.  You may learn something new or be in touch with another division leader that may appreciate and recognize your talent.
7. Keep the line open with your boss. You need to develop a relationship of trust with your boss. That may sound like being ‘political’ (translation: Being a brown noser ) but it will be obvious to him and to others if you have gone too far. To completely avoid developing a relationship is another way of alienating yourself – that will get you nowhere.   The boss is the boss. You can either fight him or work with him/her.  Keep him informed and give him what he wants – it’s that simple.

Results, clear objectives, a great attitude, initiative and good communications are always well regarded by employers. In some cases it can make the difference between being   a “Keeper” or   being  “Fired”!

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